Thursday, April 28, 2016

Fifth Stage Of Drunk

If you're an aging Parrothead you may have heard Mister Boofay's rendition of God's Own Drunk wherein he enumerates the Stages Of Drunk* which reaches a tipping point at stage five, Fuck Dinner, sliding downhill rapidly to God's Own Drunk (And A Fearless Man).

It would be easy to pick on a local politician who blew a 225 at 2:25--in the AFTERNOON--but better comics that TOD can take that on. Anyone who knows anything about drinking, anyone who has ever been commode-huggin' drunk, knows exactly what was on that dash-cam--a hardcore drunk. It takes practice and lots of it to blow a 225 and not be staggering and slurring yet if he'd not been speeding he'd still be wastin' away in his own little Margaritaville.

More interesting than the event itself is the reaction around it, especially in the Republican power structure. Fighting their normal inclination to throw him under the bus they are rallying 'round. Why? Because his opponent in the primaries is our own local version of Donald Trump who is not kissing the right arses or licking the proper boots. And it is not just moral support. The AJC reports donations from fellow Republicans and the Likker Lobby, key parts of the incumbent's power structure. Both political parties are monstrous machines of, by and for the insiders--just look at another recent AJC report on incumbency, massive war chests and buying power--that are increasingly distant from and angering those they negligently consider loyal constituents. They will tolerate no outsiders nor internal disrupters. They are as drunk on their own power as their candidate was when behind the wheel of that car.

The saying goes that a man has a drink ... the drink has a drink ... the drink has the man. What do the Republicans have?


*Also attributed to Lewis Grizzard, another that only old farts remember.