Chef Driven

Remember those days? When local politicos were touting village "revitalization" involving local, chef driven, white linen restaurants? Yes. Those days are gone. Now, with the change of ownership of the Shops, the loud chirpers are coming out damp-dreaming about some kind of mega "mixed use" re-development. 'Cuz, why not? 

Glad you asked.

Juxtapose this with the recent pull-back on drones--the latest toys for the boys. The big showstopper seems to be funding, but calling that out resulted in a closer analysis of, justification for, these drones, where it was revealed these have limited range and are basically useless outside the Perimeter area. Something about a radar unit on a Ravinia tower. To be fair, Perimeter is the source of a large portion of city revenue, and as has been pointed out by our elected officials, is also a crime hotspot. The reasons, or ponderings, range from lots of retail attracting thievery, to "this is what happens when you pack folks in real tight." 

So the chirpers have a fix (double entendre intended): let's bring high density, retail and housing, to daVille. They're dreaming of shops and restaurants, and of course the housing required to obtain footfalls to make any of this viable. Only it kinda isn't.

Sunday's AJC had a relevant article regarding the devolution of West Midtown from a funky, innovative center with top notch, locally owned, award winning restaurants, to, well, not. Seems all these cool, local and relatively small enterprises cannot survive the "revitalization" of these mega, mixed use (nee live-work-play) developments. This happens because developers create enormous spaces, because it is less effort to lease out a large footprint restaurant space than, say, three smaller ones. That level of rent, and high upfront costs to equip a space to be a usable restaurant prices the award-winning, local, but small entrepreneurs out of the market. You end up with deep-pocket, national chains selling overpriced commodity food and experiences. Think: mid-level airport eateries, like you'd find at JFK. That's exactly what the chirpers are clamoring for in daVille. 

The damage is already done at Perimeter. Sharing it with other parts of Dunwoody will not fix anything. 

QR Codes? Really?

Dunwoody Village tends to get littered with illegal signs, well, because, no enforcement. And they tend to hang around a while, sometimes literally. But there is something you may have noticed about these offensive signs polluting our community: they very often have QR codes. This is interesting because, as almost anyone without a sign knows, internet advertising is the way the world works these days. So why can't they get with the times? Plus, If you actually put up one of these illegal signs, QR code or not, you're just insulting folks who might have been customers. 

Let's look at a couple of examples stinking up the Village.

Really? HOW neighborly are you?

This is an astounding display of arrogance claiming status as a "neighborly company." Well, here's a clue "neighbor": this sign is illegal and that, around these parts, isn't considered neighborly. This alone is enough reason to never do business with your company. 

Look At Those Screws

This one is pole mounted, and these jerks were not just jerking around, they were screwing around. That's right, this bad boy is literally screwed to the pole. Hell, the city doesn't put up signs that securely. Once again, there are many folks who offer pressure washing services, and you're one that no one in daVille should ever consider.

End RoR

If the city really wants to make the village pedestrian friendly there are a few things they can do. 

They could start enforcing traffic laws. Dunwoody apparently has such a widespread reputation for non-enforcement that speeding is more the rule than the exception and red lights are frequently run with drivers sometimes flooring it ten yards before the crosswalk. Heaven forbid a pedestrian thought red means red and began to cross. Enforcement has never been even a bottom-of-the-list priority and that is not going to change. Apparently actual public safety does not garner awards. 

Something other jurisdictions are trying is eliminating Right-on-Red (RoR) as drivers never look to their right and will flatten any pedestrian trying to cross, even though the pedestrian has the walk-man light right of way. This change could make a significant improvement in pedestrian safety, much more so than banning drive through windows which the city seems hell-bent on doing. Could the mayor still be miffed about those trash cans at Burger King?

Of course outlawing RoR won't actually work because this city manager is never going to enforce traffic laws even though it is his top priority job. And yet...he keeps that job.

Damn Those Drive-thrus

Or so say city bureaucrats though they seem to have difficulty with definitions. This is a side effect of agenda driven actions. There goal is to ban all new drive-thrus and the agenda is some intellectual squishy "pedestrian friendly" nirvana. This is really their first step towards filling the village with five-over-two firetraps to inject very high density housing. And crime. 

One bureaucrat remarks that these evil drive-thrus "lead to a lot of conflicts between pedestrians and cyclists (scope creep) at points of ingress and egress." Most shops in the village would call this business. And how do these bureaucrats propose to allow for successful businesses? They will put a couple thousand apartments in the village. That's how you get the pedestrian density they covet.

What Do These Have In Common

What Do These Signs Have In Common?
Total Lack Of Enforcement

 

Drumming Up His Own Business

 

Joseph can start by removing HIS junk

In Concert

There has been some good news of late. It seems the DHA is awakening. To the fact that this city is built to serve many interests just not those of the residents, many of whom voted it into existence. The DHA is representing and more than a few regular residents have offered their, often not-so-humble opinions. Even some of the dwarfs piped up in the council meeting, specially called to reduce the time between first and second readings, to suggest that perhaps the powerful forces behind the rape and pillage of the village might do a better job of marketing. Not that they necessarily need to change their plans, just do a better sales job. City bureaucrats have been caught with the metaphorical knickers about their knees as they cannot even stay on top of the current zoning nor can they do the requisite research to establish the actual chain of agreements. Probably because those items do not fall in favor of the developers who have enlisted city bureaucrats to advance their, the developers' cause. 

And as bad as what is currently happening really is, there are deeper issues yet to be revealed. Of course if we had transparency in government (we don't) we would already know many, many things that the public has a manifest right to know. Who started this ball rolling. Names please. Who, EXACTLY, made the first contact regarding bulldozing the village to replace it with what, in these pandemic times, can only be described as a petri dish of pestilence and crime. Is high-rise, high density CoVid-proof? Hardly. Is it high-crime? Certainly. Look no further than Perimeter, but if you must, check out Atlantic Station. So who dropped the first dime? Sent the first email? Who, on OUR payroll was involved in that first conversation? How did this expand into ongoing conversations and what, EXACTLY, were those. What meetings were held? Who attended? Agenda? Minutes? And this transparency MUST include commissions and authority and should they feign autonomy exempting them from transparency it is incumbent upon our elected officials to de-commision and de-authorize any that propose opacity as their way of life. If transparency is an existential threat, then their existence should end. 

As the DHA, and others, are fighting the good, fight there should be a concurrent, concerted effort to root out the elements, those bureaucracies and bad actors, who place any interests, theirs or others, above those of the residents of this community. After all, it was zoning control and the associated quality of life that was a key factor in selling this city to the voters. And, if you're still wondering what those red-shirters were hoping save Dunwoody from, you need look no further than city hall and the out of control outsiders having their way with our community. 

Choices, Choices

So we have two dogs in the show for District 1: a former councilman and a wannabe. The former is a known quantity and was never defeated for re-election but abandoned the office to take a run at mayor. The latter is perhaps best known for openly, on the record, declaring a greater affinity for Sandy Springs than Dunwoody almost as if it is a personal loss to be in this city. Would that we could keep it an individual shortcoming. This candidate comes with the ringing endorsement of the dwarf most prior whose inability to read and understand ordinances spoke to limited academic achievement and whose grasp of representative governance flip-flopped when "personal impact" was involved. What a vote of confidence. Wannabe intends to "bring Dunwoody Village into the 21st century" a rather shameless acknowledgement of "I will work hard for the developers" and a clear intention to ignore the residents' wishes and help over-build thousands of apartments to overcrowd our schools. And no one will be surprised when wannabe endorses enormous tax handouts to these developers further undermining those same schools. But wannabe also has plans for the old Austin site looking for something "other than a grassy area." Perhaps some 8-10 story apartments? Your developers would really like that. 

The choice is yours, District 1.

Pretty Infuriating, Really.

Some of the dwarfs and bureaucrats at city hall are fuming at the recent news that Food and Wine Magazine have selected an NFA offering as the best burger in Georgia. Not best in the Village. Not best in all of Dunwoody. The best burger in the whole state. Yep. The best burger in the state can only be had at a gas station in Dunwoody Village. 

And this burger is the effort of a self-made burger genius. Not some "chef-inspired" creation at some overpriced, trendy burger joint (remember "Zin Burger") but a guy with passion and drive. Oh, and that one other ingredient: a community based, suburban center that fosters and encourages the entrepreneurial spirit that has infused Dunwoody Village self-renewing vitality (think: "Village Burger"). 

This doesn't sit well with the dwarfs and their bureaucrat overlords that will only tolerate things they have a hand in even if that is only to their benefit and actually stifles innovation. Because when they don't benefit it cannot be allowed. And that is why the success of NFA Burger has them pissed.

Keep On Truckin'

Every now and then we are blessed with a business committed to the community who walks the walk of being a good corporate citizen. In Dunwoody Village that good corporate citizen would be Publix. Much like other businesses in the village it was not uncommon for their delivery trucks to boogey thru the no-truck zones, but when the Manager of Publix was approached concerning this issue he offered an unusual response (for a business in Dunwoody): he changed the truck route to comply with the law and the community expectations. This manager deserves our thanks and Publix deserves our business. 

But You Don't Have To

The Seven Dwarfs, as part of their Village Pillage & Plunder campaign, have decided that what the Village needs to vitalize* it is more trashy signs. The trashier the better. The more the merrier. 

These changes have been in the works since early July in the Planning Commission, another part of the city's machinery that works exclusively for businesses' benefit. A staff member in the city's Community Development Department** had the balls to explain how this makes the Overlay more like the rest of the city. WTF???? What the hell does this overpaid bureaucrat think the Overlay is for in the first place? If budget times are tough this looks like an excellent opportunity to save some expenses. On that paycheck.

One of the Seven Dwarfs pushed back against minimizing the number of signs allowed even though it would still be more than the community desires and even had the unmitigated gall to say this reduced number might not benefit the businesses? Did the businesses elect this Dwarf? Or are they just making sure he benefits from business as usual? 

Yes, we need to vote these bozos out of office at the first opportunity. But we also must remember that because you can doesn't mean you must. More immediate action is to boycott any business that thinks insulting this community with their trashy signs is a good idea. 

*In a recent Blue Bag Rag article the city, who are really behind these articles, announced their consultants plans to "vitalize" Dunwoody Village. The use of "vitalize" rather than "revitalize" is neither accidental, nor accurate, nor cheap. The implication is that the Village is not now and never has been "vital" and only they, by implementing the plans supplied by their developer colleagues, can make the Village vital. Until their developer buddies break ground and make profit, the Village is just another shit-hole. To them anyway.

**How the hell many groups do we have at this city that serve no one but developers and businesses? Does this city do anything for residents? Is there anyway the charter can be fixed to stop this happy horseshit? 

Fish Mongers

Imagine you're the fish. First you were lured to the bait. You took the bait and when hooked may have fought the good fight but were brought to net. Now you're on the table, gasping, struggling for life. Standing over you is the fish monger who you can only glimpse out of that one, upward looking eye as the other is blinded by the table. The monger stands there with the glinting knife, a fiendish smile on his face. You barely feel the blade slip in, slide down. Pain overwhelms you as your guts are ripped from your body. The peace of death comes as your muscles and nerves slowly expire. 

Now imagine not a fish, but the village overlay. And the gutting monger? That would be the mayor and council who are poised this very day to fully gut the sign ordinances of the Dunwoody Village Overlay in order to feed your flesh to their business family. That is what they really mean when they say they're here to serve you.

Some of you will simply disengage saying this doesn't affect you because you don't live near the village. But think about this: these people are voracious and there are more fish on the monger's table. They're smiling, their knives are glinting and your guts may be the next to spill.

Is This A Good Sign?

In Dunwoody you will never know. Because the city doesn't want you to know. And it doesn't have to be that way. So let's look at how professionals do it.

You start with a permitting process. That's right, you want to put up a sign then you go to the city (or online if you're in the 21st century) and you apply for a permit. Then you get a sticker to affix to the sign so that anyone who wants can check that the sign is approved as legal. This is done in neighboring cities, the ones without rampant sign pollution. Fun fact: this was actually done in Dunwoody, but that was when the county (remember Vernon?) was in charge but once the city took over the city was taken over by businesses and well...here we are. 

Because of the city supported Uglify Dunwoody campaign, rolling out sign permitting is a start but is far from sufficient. It must be possible for citizens to quickly and easily enforce sign permitting. There needs to be an app for that. Stickers should be like license plate stickers with clearly distinguishable markings indicating type and and expiration date. They should also include a QR code used by the app to pull up detailed information on the applicant, the sign, the sign type and current status (e.g., expired). If the permit is expired an immediate notification will be made by the app to the system and a fine will automatically be issued.

Type, location and presentation would be supported by the app with the inclusion of one or more photos as well as the GPS location of the offending situation. This would require action on the part of city staff, which to date has been willfully absent, but the application will further allow anyone to access the complaint reports and monitor progress, both by the offender and the city. 

Equally important is that GPS location can be used to support varying rules, based on overlay districts or specific communities. Not only can the system provide immediate updates to concerned parties but it can provide, in the moment, the status (approved or illegal) to the resident who is concerned about Beautifying Dunwoody. 

At the end of the day, only the residents of Dunwoody will determine what is and is not a "Good Sign" and it is incumbent upon a city originally intended to serve those residents to step up and empower those residents.

Bring The Mountain...

...To Austin.

So the Tiger Moms and Dragon Dads at DES are still fuming at their own impotence when it comes to inflicting upon a neighboring school, AES, that which they feel is being inflicted upon them: apartment kids. Evil, wicked, often darker apartment kids.

In desperation they fired up the bat-signal and it is City Hall to the rescue. If you cannot send DES apartment kids to Austin they'll bring apartments to the Village and all those new apartment kids to Austin. Take that you snooty, uptight AES parents! And if you think your representative at Council is there to help you better think again-she is in on it.

You're screwed and if you voted for this [mis]representation then you pretty much got what you deserve. And if you're like some other folks in Dunwoody you really don't care that someone else gets screwed in the process. You may even enjoy the notion.

Karma, Sugar Glazed

Now Closed!

Fool's Gold

What is Dunwoody Village? That is the question of the moment and when posed by the folks we have on our payroll, it is a rhetorical question because city staff is going to do what they are told. By the developers.  But really, what is Dunwoody Village?

Well to look at the map it is a relatively small area centered around the Chevron station that started it all. Exclusively businesses but unless the map changes the upcoming Postal Townhouses on The Parkway will add "live" to work-play in the overlay. That's the geography but what is this Village? From a resident's perspective--you know the folks that live around here, shop there and keep the place alive?

You gotta start with Banks. Bankwoody has replaced Dunwoody Housewife Jokes as the Dunwoody Dig. And yes there are plenty of banks but keep in mind some have relocated keeping the net-net under control. And banks can be useful, especially if you want to buy a house or a car. Know what else is handy? Real estate agents and the village has quite the selection of those. And sneaking under the radar is a rather recent growth in law firms--in the farmhouse and over on The Parkway to name just a few. And your car? Which one of those banks holds the title on? Need new tires, service or repairs, or just get it cleaned--over half a dozen places awaiting your business. In the village. Just need to handle normal errands? Mail and shipping? Gotcha covered. Laundry and dry cleaning? How do so many even stay in business? Good eats? Pick your cuisine, price range and dining experience--you'll find multiple options from fast food to white napkin, from burgers to brunch to bar food. Into entertaining at home? Two grocers, a liquor/wine store and growler shop. In the village. Need to work off some of that fine dining? Choose your poison: yoga, pilates, hard workout. In the village. Need an MD after over-doing it, well you're going to have pick a speciality and then choose from one of many. In the village. Same for dentistry. In the village. Need a gash stitched or bone set? Two emergency doc-in-a-box to choose from. In the village. Meds involved? Two big box pharmacies and one independent. In the village. Want to get your doo on? Even without Super Signs there are over half a dozen places to get trimmed, coifed, tinted, polished and massaged. Yep, in the village. And that is the tip of the iceberg given there are multiple office condos and rentals hosting a wide variety of businesses. In the village.

There is a word for The Village: thriving. Businesses have come and gone over the years. Because it is thriving. The Village has been a place where someone with an idea, commitment and a dedication to serving the community can succeed and those with good ideas and hard work and willingness to embrace the community have succeeded. There is a word for those folks: entrepreneur. None of this happened overnight and it didn't happen because of or in spite of bricks and beige. It reflects the hard work of these business people and residents who have supported them. It is not some pre-fab, factory made spawn of a strip-mall architect's pen--it is a reflection of the community. The DVO is merely a legal document codifying what this community has built over the decades.

But developers have a new buzzword, "vibrant," and they're using City staff to get it out. What is "vibrant"? Well if you want to see what "vibrant" was a few years back drive up North Point Parkway from Mansell to the mall. What do you see? Stacked stone. Everywhere. Why? Because just a few years ago developers said that was "vibrant". No more. Now faux-factory-reno-loft-industrial is "vibrant" but what will be "vibrant" five years down the road? Who knows but it won't be what is "vibrant" today because development in this area is brownfield. It is re-development. So developers have baked in planned obsolescence and its name is "vibrant".

These developers are catering to a demographic with short attention spans who are easily attracted to the shiny, the new. The superficial. Those who will soon need something else that is shiny, new. A demographic that is shallow and transient--intellectually if not geographically.  Is that your Dunwoody? Is that the Dunwoody you want? What are you going to do about it?

A Greener Shade Of Beige

The City is well on the way to gutting the Dunwoody Village Overlay as part of their indefensible but unstoppable kowtowing to business and developers. The brazenness of the developer's open threat to bring in undesirables if they don't get what they want is clear indication that City Hall has their back and that they have your number. That is if you happen to be one of those simultaneously fond of the Williamsburg requirement and appalled by its imminent demise.

But what the shiplap is this Williamsburg thing and what does it mean? Of course it is symbolism but what does it mean?

Leading the list is homogeneity, the only "homo" some will tolerate. It is not limited to the uber-HOA, all houses look the same. When you see a community of ticky-tacky all in a row you kinda know what is inside and Williamsburg, even with the beige, screams lily white. And that screams Dunwoody--Olde School.

Then there is superficiality. It is bricks and beige and slate-look roofs but little substance. It is as if someone played architectural spin-the-bottle and this is what we got. At least it isn't shiplap.

Perhaps it is a flag, or a pennant for what would have been a visiting team. One that seems to have decided to stay but insisted on the literal and figurative reminder of home. White flight may have been the Dunwoody zygote but that grew by attracting that "special demographic" from locales far from ITP. Where "Williamsburg" actually means something.

What was once bucolic farmland was overrun by urban sprawl, development guided only by greed and a population fueled by local white flight and opportunistic northern invaders. If tradition trumps all why was there such a battle over urban henhouses? Should we have farmhouse styling with barn wood, white siding and tin roofs? Or should we recognize that Williamsburg, like the farms beforehand has had its day?

What should be remembered is that which is constant. Politicians are beholden to business, turning blind eyes when expedient, writing custom laws when necessary and taking liberties with the power and prestige of their positions. They will gut this city like a sturgeon to get anything they can serve up to their business buddies as caviar. 

Yankee Go Home

And take your faux Williamsburg "style" with you.

Or so say the powers that be in Dunwoody. And in case you have any doubts those powers are called "developers" and the developers at hand are Crim and Associates. And the Brothers Crim have no qualms about making an open threat suggesting that if they don't get what they want, the way they want it then they'll gather tenants that would be "not what you want." The property has been a problem child in the Village Overlay with the DHA getting really pissy when it went from a gas station to a car wash with the kind of backlash that later resurfaced around the Parkway. Now the property is leveled awaiting SLUPs, Waivers and Overlay changes so the Brothers can build what they want which is definitely NOT Williamsburg style.

And guess what is going to happen? It should come as no surprise that City Staff are preparing proposals to gut the Village Overlay and the Council is chomping at the bit to do the Brothers' bidding. Why no surprise? Because outside of one property owner who fell for the "you remodel you must widen the sidewalk" requirement in the Overlay District the City has shown no diligence in enforcing any of the Overlay requirements. Hell, they've not even shown much in the way of interest regarding their own rules but if any Friends and Family business owner, City resident or not, needs custom, just-for-me ordinances, well then "drinks are on the house!"

Go With Luck

Another flailing retail operation finds the exit unable to save itself even with open disrespect for City ordinances and supported by the blind eye of their representative on City Council.

Nearby, the most egregious violator of the Dunwoody Overlay proudly claims the title of "Enemy From Within." Shame on them. They should and probably do know better and their disregard for this community is all the more repugnant. Shame. On. Them. And the Councilor in their back pocket.

To each and every business and politician who holds this community in disdain: go with luck--but go!

Happy Ending

Tolerated (encouraged?) by District One's business representative.

BYOB?

Constituents know what they've been getting but November is nigh upon us and maybe there will be a happy ending.