Is The Phoeix Rising?

You know about the first town homes in the Dunwoody Village area, don't you? The ones across Chamblee-Dunwoody from the Spruill Center for the Arts? With the adjacent cluster homes off Ashford Center Parkway, a real parkway with medians hosting trees. 

Do you remember how that happened?

Well, back in the day that property lay empty and was owned by Emory University who wanted to cash in, so they found a developer. As you do. Remember what Greedy Developer wanted to do? Build a shopping center anchored by a super-sized Publix. When the Village already had THREE grocery stores. Not because it was what this community needed but simply because it would rake in the most money. 

So why didn't that happen?

Dunwoody Home Owners Association. They stepped up to the plate and made it clear this community would not be steam-rolled without putting up a fight. An expensive fight. A long, drawn-out legal battle. And guess what happened? We got some damn nice looking town homes instead of a yet another ticky-tacky strip center with all that traffic that really belongs on Highway 41, not in the heart of Dunwoody. 

There is some indication that the DHA put some effort into protecting our neighborhoods and our suburban character in the developer (and city) assault on Dunwoody Village. Are they back? Perhaps. Perhaps they're coming back as they lost their way in the early years of city-hood, weakening their capabilities to fight the good fight. After all, wasn't city-hood supposed to be the ultimate victory and not a toxic bait and switch? 

Let's all hope the DHA is revitalized and only getting stronger. It may be the only hope we have.

They Hate Us. They Really, REALLY Hate Us.

If Sally Fields lived in the Branches, either of the Winters, Creek or Hall, Redfield or a few other unnamed residential areas adjacent to or very near the Village, you could imagine that is exactly what she would say.  And she would be right.

This comes about because there has been a bump in the road on the developers' path to total destruction of our suburban shopping centers, Dunwoody Hall and Dunwoody Village. The planning commission has deferred a vote. Not voted the matter down, just waiting for a more opportune time. One might excuse this as incompetence that the planning commission did not already know of and have in hand the documents in question, or maybe they do and have and there is something else afoot. Maybe they really, really hate us.

And there is good reason to think that. After all, developers and profiteering businesses are openly shameless in their greed. They don't give us any consideration, let alone hate us. They are in love with money and that is merely the root of the evil afflicting us. We need to consider the trunk and the branches. And that lies with the bureaucracy at city hall. 

While developers and profiteers have molded Dunwoody to their liking since the very first day and the city is structured to allow this, the real hatred emanates from and festers within the city itself. It is at city hall where we find the intense hatred of suburbia and yes, the irony of this coming from what was created as a suburban city is lost on no one. And our shining example of successful suburbia is the thriving, vital shopping and business district known as Dunwoody Village. For several decades this center has well served the community and in return has been equally well supported by that community. Yes, developers are eyeing the lucrative opportunity to replace the Village with a mega-development high density retail and multi-story apartments to generate the footfalls. But make no mistake, in city hall's genocidal lust to destroy the Village the surrounding communities will not be just collateral damage-they have become secondary targets.

The situation appears hopeless and helpless. Loyal opposition has either passed or swum off to warmer waters. The DHA was a staunch proponent of city formation and one has to wonder if anyone in that organization was aware of the deliberate structural flaws in the city they helped create. Initially DHA did positioned themselves as the conduit to power, a stepping stone to city office, or more lucratively, membership on one of the many bureaus, administrations or boards. More recently they seem to have come to a fork in their road: continue as a remora  clinging to the power-hungry sharks at city hall; or advocate, as they once did so long ago, for the residents of Dunwoody. 

We Have Met The Enema

We've had the "Save Dunwoody" movement receiving the apathetic reaction of "from what?" and now we know: from "us" depending on how you actually define "us." Bringing this to the forefront is the temporal juxtaposition of the aggressive effort on the part of city hall to rape Dunwoody Village and the comments of the outgoing DHA president who is calling out the bureaucrats and politicians invested in this rape and pillage as having abandoned any commitment to Dunwoody residents in favor of greed: developer greed; business greed; and political greed.

One might dismiss this as a parting shot from an outgoing president and surely the Seven Dwarfs would like to think that is the case. The problem is the president is merely rotating out, remaining on the board. Furthermore, the DHA has taken the action of hiring a lawyer to call the city out on the rape of Dunwoody Village, reminiscent of days of yore when the DHA prevented the development of a mega-Publix across the street from the library. Due to their efforts a community of townhomes and unattached single family homes, a much better complement to Dunwoody, are there now. 

So maybe, just maybe, the DHA has shaken off the role as pipeline to the politicians selling us down the river and has regained their position as the rightful defenders of Dunwoody residents as the loyal opposition to forces of greed that are making DeKalb County look benign. 

Existential Threats

There's one problem with claims of City action posing an existential threat to the DHA--there is an existence proof to the contrary.

It wasn't that long ago there was no City of Dunwoody, but there was a DHA. How can that be? Did the DHA have a couple dozen folks down in Decatur sitting on zoning boards, planning commissions and the like? Hell no, they didn't. And yet the DHA existed. And the DHA will not cease to exist if it re-acquires the level of influence at Dunwoody City Hall that it formerly wielded at DeKalb County offices.

That the DHA views a reasonable separation, even a firewall, between DHA board negotiations with developers and official City decisions and actions regarding those same developers as an existential threat is the clearest proof that the DHA is indeed bartering with their influence at City Hall.

Comments and statements to the contrary do not pass the smell test.

First they claimed to be "just another homeowners group" which they later upgraded to "like the Buckhead Coalition." Still not quite right. The Buckhead Coalition represents the interests of the Buckhead community, not all parts of the City as the DHA lays claim to for Dunwoody. Because of that members of the Coalition suffer from a geographic constraint limiting their ability to dominate citizen boards and panels. Not so with the DHA.

Then there is the claim that members do not receive marching orders from their DHA superiors. Perhaps that is technically true. But they do go to the Sunday revival meetings where the folks in the pulpit describe the souls they've saved and how wonderful the glory. Folks come out with admiration for their workings and have certainly been singing from the same hymnal. Were they brought to the alter for the layin' on of hands to shouts of HEAL? Probably not. But there is little doubt they'll be bringing the Good Word to the unwashed down at the Big Hall.

Clearly the City does not pose an existential threat to the DHA. It is increasingly clear that the DHA poses such a threat to the City. 

Dunwoody Goat Rodeo

Rumours out of the Blue Bag Rag suggest that our hired-gun City Attorney has asked a higher authority, the State Attorney General, for an opinion regarding the executive session which breathed life into the no-DHA policy. Thankfully it is just an opinion and not an investigation being requested. Should someone with subpoena power embark on an actual investigation this could go pear-shaped in skinny minute.

First would be the City Hall investigation questioning not only the legitimacy of forming policy in closed executive session but singling out an individual organization. The former is surely a faux pas but the latter may light a fuse on a bigger bomb. It may be hard to limit this investigation to just City Hall as their actions were reactionary even if the risk is only perceived. One might question if there is any substance to the perception or has someone been licking some stamps from the sixties.

If the investigation were to expand to cover development protocols in DaVille, DHA genuflection costs and benefits and surety of back-room commitments we might find ourselves with a real goat rodeo on our hands. 

Mizz Dunwoody Bitch Slaps Mista DHA

The relationship between Mizz Dunwoody and her Mista has always been publicly pleasant if at times unseemly or downright incestuous. Recently an earth shattering breakup has Mizz Dunwoody kicking Mista DHA outa da house and to the curb. The abruptness leads some observers to believe Mizz Dunwoody has gone a bit crazy or might be over-reacting to some minor cock-up, like Mista DHA leaving the toilet seat up. Again. But somehow this has a burning bed quality about it.

Reaction in DaVille was immediate and in some cases pre-emptive. Some with an eye for Mista DHA as well as a slightly catty attitude towards Mizz Dunwoody are already slinging mud on Mista's behalf. Fact is they've been making catty remarks only slightly under their breath for some time and now that a crack has opened they are driving a wedge hard and fast all the while batting an eye at Mista DHA. The heart wants what the heart wants.

In reality even the batty-eyed flirts don't know what really happened. Mizz Dunwoody didn't just bitch slap the Mista, she lawyered up and laid a gag order on his stunned face. His initial compliance may be a simple delay tactic until he finds the better lawyers or it may be that Mizz Dunwoody has something that not only constitutes irreconcilable differences but might point to something significantly more serious and embarrassing than a brief indiscretion. And if Mista's courtesan's don't know how are the poor disengaged denizens of this burg to know?

Perhaps the better question is "why would we want to and what good would it do?" It's pretty obvious this split is for real and for good. The lawyers alone indicate that makeup sex is not in this couple's future and while his flirts may service Mista DHA, Mizz Dunwoody seems hellbent on standing tall. And alone.

But what now for Mista DHA? The sting is fresh and there is a risk of anger overruling reason. He may seek to vanquish Mizz Dunwoody on a field of legal battle but he would only win a pyrrhic victory. With significant collateral damage. Us.

Maybe Mista DHA can turn his attention to Miss Schoolhouse. They could be DaVille's next power couple. Or perhaps he can leverage his remaining wealth to invest in real estate. There are some nearby properties, notably a failed restaurant that he could save from becoming a successful bank. So many options. Only one of them bad.

Mizz Dunwoody and Mista DHA were, in their day, such an admirable couple. Let's hope bickering and acrimony don't permanently tarnish the image. 

Seventy Five Percent Solution

Developers want to do what developers do--develop property. And they do it for one reason only--to make money. And we have some developers who are going to develop apartments in Dunwoody's Perimeter Center.

Now they can't say that straight up. They have to spin (AKA deceive and mislead) the issue. First they'll say they're not building apartments, they're building condo's. But they have a problem which they will make your problem. And that problem is these units get built all at once but the retail real estate market won't absorb them all at once. Sales will take time. Rentals are quicker so they are going rent these condos making them indistinguishable from apartments. Plus this is a recurring revenue stream whilst sales are one-time transactional. This will not be rental by individual (like you renting your Four-Four-and-a-Door) but by a developer. A developer who will most likely hire a rental management firm to handle the day to days. Quacks and waddles like a duck.

The City negotiated a long term goal of seventy five percent owner occupied, except that is a "goal" five years out and the developer intends to put up for sale only fifty percent on day one. And the developer has already voiced his displeasure and intent to get a more favorable hearing from Council: "We hope by the time it gets to the council it will be more of what we are looking for."  The developer's mouthpiece acknowledged that seventy five percent was better than the ninety percent owner occupied the Planning Commission advocated saying: "We've had 16 banks talk to us ... and they can't finance at 90 percent owner-occupancy."

The fact is it will never be seventy five percent owner occupied. It will probably never make it to fifty percent. And it gets worse. The FHA will not give loans on these units because the developer will start, maybe, at fifty percent rental and the FHA only allows that if the remaining units are owner-occupied as a principle residence. Out of the gate FHA approval is highly unlikely. So who cares? Well one might expect Millennials to be a demographic most likely to apply for and get FHA loans. Who wants them around anyway? Oh, wait ... WE DO! Or so we say when catering to apartment-building developers.

And cater we do. There is a brash prevarication claiming this development will not spill over to our neighborhoods and won't affect homeowners' quality of life. Really? REALLY? Have these folks never heard of a silly little thing called SCHOOLS? Do schools not affect our quality of life? Have we included a no-children, adult only restriction? Can we? And just who might be interested in these schools anyway? You guessed it! Those pesky Millennials again. This "line of reasoning" sounds like a thinly veiled shill for the developers.

If these are condos, and that is what the developer calls them, then the appropriate level of owner-occupancy is one hundred percent. Zero rentals. Now if the developer needs a government handout, good luck finding one who doesn't, it is real simple. Write into the Declaration of Condominium that each and every unit can be rented for five years total over the entire life of the unit. To make sure they don't just amend the document, ensure that it can only be amended by a super-majorly of individual principal-residence owner-occupants and only after these residence own over fifty percent of all units. After the five years are used up the unit sits empty or you price it to sell. Hard. Stop. Oh, and whilst it sits empty you still get to pay the Condo Association fees.

Ain't gonna happen.

At the end of the day here is what we know: residential units will be built; many, then most, then almost all will be rental; there will be negative impacts on our infrastructure; there will be negative impacts on our schools; and the developer will not pay a dime in impact fees. And there are those amongst us who are happy to help out a poor developer. 

They Are Pretty Sure You ARE Stupid

Smart City logo notwithstanding most politicos and developers hovering around daVille are quite confident the Citizens OF Dunwoody are pretty dumb. The content of the aforementioned Shadow Government meeting, where development of high density residences was discussed, indicates that pretty much everyone in attendance is convinced that you are stupid.

In typical Frog Soup fashion it started tepid. The developer currently has zoning for office towers. Three of them. Ranging from 24 to 28 stories. Sounds like a license to print money doesn't it? And just think of the non-voting tax revenue those businesses will pump into the City coffers.

Problem is he actually wants to develop residences: hotel, rental and condo; and has asked for two additional buildings exclusively for these purposes. Additional. Or so they say to get the nod from the Shadows.

Then the soup got hot.

The topic of development timeline reveled that the developer intends to build the residential units "sooner than the office towers because the market is good for that." While the claim, not a promise and certainly not a contractual obligation, was that the "office buildings would be constructed over multiple years" was intended to calm the crowd it really served as a restatement of "we're building high density residential to flood your schools and if it suits our pocketbooks we may build those offices--or we may not if the market isn't good for that."

Shadow voted to approve the Developer's proposal.

Maybe DHA should be rebranded as Dunwoody Housing Authority. Maybe it already has.

Official Shadow Government

"I read it on the internet" is a running joke loosely translating to "you cannot believe a word of it." Not so with legitimate journalism. How can we be so certain? Just ask any legitimate journalist--they'll tell you. The Dunwoody Fan Rag, our local font of legitimate journalism, has exposed Dunwoody's Shadow Government--the Dunwoody Homeowners Association. It is revealed in a recent front page article with this headline:

But not how you might imagine. The exposure resulted when the article, as one of such magnitude must, is split and continued further into the rag.

"page 9" is miraculously correct

And lest you think that was just a front page screwup, the article continues with:

"page 3" however is not

How could anyone in legitimate media get it wrong twice? They can't--they're just that good. So the only reasonable conclusion is that "the Council" is just code-word for "the DHA."