Thursday, November 21, 2013

What Does Jesus Drive?

With the demise of Pontiac what is a brother to drive? Well Chrysler stepped up with the answers. First it was the luxe 300 sedan--and it didn't hurt when they reached into urban hippity hop royalty for star endorsements. Now we're looking at the Challenger which plays a starring role alongside LL Cool J in NCIS-LA.

So it didn't take very long for even our over-militarized police forces to observe that a significant proportion of these cars are driven by African Americans. On the one hand this is simple testimony to effective marketing and advertising. On the other hand this correlation is now being used to profile drivers for issuance of DWB citations.

Even here in DeKalb.

Turns out DCPD have been using this technique and also ripping a page right out of Dunwoody's play book: calling in the dogs.  Citizens of Chrysler are being stopped and then detained and held until a local indicate on cue dog is brought in to ensure the vehicle is searched regardless of what the Fourth Amendment says. Local TV investigative reporters have yet to divulge how the Police guarantee contraband is found but they have made quite the stir with the Chrysler Crisis. Nor have they investigated how low local Police have lowered the bar of "probable cause" but apparently it is synonymous with "refusal of search."

We know this is happening and is a growth market but what happens when our African American brothers are tapped out? Perhaps it will be time to turn our Police attention to our brown skinned neighbors from South of the Border.

So we find ourselves asking:
"What Does Jesus Drive?"
In short, how do we profile these drivers? Turns out this is easier than we thought.

Just read the name. Even your average 'roid ragin' patrolman can connect these dots. Under the circumstances and with our history of tolerance it should come as no surprise that Dunwoody sees the opportunity to be a leader in aggressive Law Enforcement against this demographic conveniently located along our periphery.

But it isn't just about Law Enforcement. It's about community outreach. Consequently our PD has gone into the community to ask for their assistance to ensure that even officers who have difficulty with hispanic surnames and Mexican place-names can meet their quotas. The community has gladly stepped up.

This community participation promises to propel Dunwoody ahead of all our local and even national competitors in the race to enforce our laws based on race, creed and culture.

But what's next?

Contrary to popular opinion here in the Wold there is not an inexhaustible supply of blacks and hispanics. Perhaps we need to consider what is surely the next question:
"What does Moses drive?"