What? When?

Some of the city's founding fathers have become outspoken of late, decrying the dumpster fire they set alight. No, they're not apologizing, they are chastising the bureaucrats running this shit-show. Well, someone should. And there is much to worry about as well described elsewhere. 

But it raises questions. Where are the other founders? Not just the locals currently playing but the two big hitters. Where are Fran and Dan? Are they proud of what's going on? Supportive? Is this what they intended? And let's be clear, this is intentional, just look at the city charter.

In this section we get:

Who knew? That's a serious question, not a joke. Which of these founders was responsible for this? Who approved of it? Which ones even read the charter before they went out selling it to the voters? Did they really not know that a vote for this city was the last meaningful vote allowed in this city? Do they not understand that this clause means that none of the clowns we elect can do anything, unless you consider a chit chat with the Top Bureaucrat "doing something"?

There is a small ray of hope in section 2.12 subsection a:

The council can eliminate bloat by excising it bit by bit. Well, to be honest, not THIS council, but there is hope that one can be elected that might wield the sword. The only other option is to fire the city manager, something with increasing appeal. 

Writ Of Mandamus

More on the writ later, but first let's set the stage...

As many of you may know there has been a dinosaur zoo operating in Dunwoody for a few years now. Not live dinosaurs or even fossilized bones but the inflate-a-date variety. Now the city is shutting down the dino-zoo and that is making fur fly over on fece-book with most seeing dino-extinction as a sin against god and humanity. Mostly because their kids liked it. 

This would be a real teaching moment if it weren't taking so long. Some are just now learning that Dunwoody takes an "enforce on complaint" approach to anything they deign to address and with any action subject to their assessment of the complainer, the alleged offender and the alleged violation. This has led some to call for an open records request to identify the dino-hater presumably to go after them, but be honest, isn't guessing more fun? Others are seeking their very own inflate-a-dino to defy "the man." Others cannot fathom how an inflatable is a sign. Some want to "throw the bums out" suggesting write-ins for the unchallenged in the upcoming election. The zoo-keeper confesses to knowing the rules but has been doing this for three years which may not be the best thing to immortalize on the interweb. The mayor is going to "look into it" which is politician-speak for "I'm outta here" as there is much that any city politician would not want the electorate figuring out as they dig into this affair. Let's learn that anyway.

We'll start with the "sign, not-sign" confustication by looking at the actual ordinance, specifically Section 20-34 - Prohibited Signs:

Except as otherwise provided by this chapter, the following signs are prohibited within the city:

(1)Dilapidated signs, including sign structures.

(2)Animated signs, including balloons, streamers, air or gas filled figures, signs that move mechanically as a result of human activity, wherever located.

There you have it, no ignorance, no excuse. Those dinos are prohibited and in violation of city ordinance. You should also know that this ordinance passed unanimously, 7-0, with much self-congratulatory backslapping and support from many if not most of the current politicians. So what exactly is the mayor looking into? An unread ordinance that was voted for? How often does that happen?

Suppose the mayor does look into it. Can the mayor actually do anything? Let's see what the city charter has to say about that, specifically Sec. 3.05. - City council interference with administration:

Except for the purpose of inquiries and investigations under Section 2.08 of this Charter, the city council or its members shall deal with city officers and employees who are subject to the direction or supervision of the city manager solely through the city manager, and neither the city council nor its members shall give orders to any such officer or employee, either publicly or privately.

It is impossible to believe that anyone who voted yes for the Dunwoody referendum ever read this (or ever will) as this prohibition is kryptonite to all those Dunwoody zionists preaching local control. Dunwoody is modeled more after DeKalb Schools with powerless elected officials than after DeKalb county where our elected officials have real staff, real responsibilities and offer the electorate real control. In Dunwoody, voting in new bobble-heads only affects the entertainment value of council meetings. 

The third leg of this stool is the "enforce on complaint" practice. Here we look to Sec. 3.04. - City manager; powers and duties enumerated:

The city manager shall have the power, and it shall be his or her duty to:

(1)See that all laws and ordinances are enforced;

Job one: enforce all laws and ordinances. In what world is that: just sit on the sidelines until someone complains? No one should be complaining because if the city manager were getting the legally mandated job done there would be nothing to complain about. Why? Because if all laws and ordinances had been enforced then this one in particular would have been enforced three years ago. Isn't what the city is doing to us the very definition of dereliction of duty? And since the only thing mayor and council can do is upgrade the city manager, which they are not doing, they too seem to have dropped the ball. And none of this seems to bother any of them.

This brings us to the writ of mandamus, a court order forcing a government to do its job. Maybe it is time to pursue that path as we're living in the municipal equivalent of a failed state where clearly defined responsibilities are being ignored in deference to...who knows what. This city's failure has conditioned folks to believe that ordinances don't matter, which means your vote doesn't matter, because the council vote doesn't matter. Just ignore what you don't like and hope no one important complains. And had the city done its job these dinos would not have been up long enough for folks to come to believe if something is popular or you get away with it long enough then it cannot be illegal even when it is. Is that what we want to teach our children? Because that is exactly what this city is doing.

Panning For Gold

Mayor, council and city bureaucrats bugged out to gold country to ponder how to part you with more of your gold without you having any say in the matter.  Now there was a lot of suspicious talk going on, like the myth about citizens having any demands or expectations that city bureaucrats give a rip about, but the common thread was how to extract more money from us in such a way that we could not possibly prevent them from pilfering our pockets. Some talk about raising the millage rate (we've had nothing but TAX increases, but via the backdoor) but it seemed there was one significant stumbling block: the city charter. The sales (snow?) job used to sell this dumpster fire to the voters hinged on limited government, local control and fiscal prudence, none of which sit well with the bureaucrats the voters (unknowingly?) turned their lives over to. But the charter has a baked in millage rate limit and requirements for referendum to make some of their most coveted changes. But they left themselves a backdoor: no referendum is required to change the charter. They can do that with just a little help from their friends. 

The current train wreck at city hall has folks calling for top-level resignations and firings which is sending chills down the collective bureaucratic spine. So, perhaps there is some trepidation around initiating a re-write of the city charter. Maybe, just maybe, there will be a citizen revolt with the people who live here demanding that those we elect be assigned actual responsibility for city operations. Maybe then the citizens of Dunwoody will get what they thought they voted for in the first place.

Whose Phone Is Ringing?

Perhaps the real question is "whose phone should be ringing?"

Recently there have been calls, unanswered calls, for the removal by resignation of Dunwoody's self-proclaimed Top Cop. But these callers may have the wrong number or at least not all the right ones. Does Dunwoody need a PD shakeup starting at the top and including the upper ranks? Absolutely. 

But this would miss the mark.

As required by the City Charter the police chief reports to the city manager. The same city manager who has, by inaction, endorsed the incompetence and misbehavior permeating his (and it is his) police department. Clearly the calls for the Top Cop's resignation fall short of the mark. These fish rot first at the head and it is stinking to high heaven. The calls should be for the removal of the city manager. When, if ever, will our elected officials answer that call?

Can We Quote You On That?

The AJC quoted our Top Cop as saying:

"As law enforcement officers, we are and should be held to the highest standards of conduct whether on or off duty. We will conduct a thorough investigation of this incident and the actions of our officers."

Wow. Lot to unpack there. Does the Top Cop's "highest standards" include running a porn operation? Police shootings of members of gen-pop, including fatalities? Civil rights violations? Enforce DWB but no patrolling of school zones, again with the fatality connection? Those are symptomatic of a very perverted view of "highest standards."

The clear signal of furtherance of the disaster is "we will conduct a thorough investigation." Danger Will Robinson! Will this be like the whitewash coverup of the porno ring? Perhaps there is a higher, nobler authority. The Georgia State Patrol was called to the scene and perhaps, just maybe, this is a good time to involve the GBI. Now you might be thinking that a statewide organization might be keeping track of errant officers.  Maybe you're thinking of POST? Because they tend to let a lot of very serious incidents fall through the cracks and off the record.

It is hard to tally up the full cost of this systemic incompetence, but it starts with the salaries of the city manager and top cop, both of whom should be fired. With cause. Then there are the legal fees being paid to defend this incompetence, often a losing cause resulting in further payouts. One must really wonder what it takes for the mayor and council to take the actions necessary to clean up this mess.

Cath The Council

It IS silly season so you may have seen the "Cath" signs loitering on roads around daVille. Now if you're of a certain age and circumstance where proximity to Pill Hill is major advantage to you location then you might be thinking "Cath" is short for "catheter." You might be thinking that's not a bad idea, cath the council. If you've been paying attention you might think a better MD would have ordered a high colonic. But. You gotta start somewhere.

Then you find out out that "Cath" ain't catheter, it actually refers to the dwarf-wanna-be that really, Really, REALLY wishes she lived in Sandy Springs instead of Dunwoody. To read it in the Blue Bag Rag, it would seem somehow impolite to mention that, so...

We should definitely skip THAT Cath.

Job One

Reports have surface recently in one of the local rags indicating that the mayorette and some of the other dwarfs are "concerned over pandemic learning loss." 

Wow! There is a lot hidden in there, most of it unadulterated hypocrisy.  How so? Let us explore the ways.

Perhaps the biggest, stinkiest floater is the simple fact that this city by way of mayor, council and developer's authority actively and aggressively work to undermine our schools. They do this by taking properties off the tax rolls, moving all that money directly into the profits of greedy, but well-connected developers. To be very clear, the city is doing this unilaterally, without school board input even though the vast majority of tax diversion is being taken directly from the school system. Just look at your own property tax bill. Yet we have "representation" at city hall that have the chutzpah to express concern about our children and our schools. There is a special place in hell for these kinds of politicians and it seems that social distancing is not an option. 

Then there is the obvious. No elected official at city hall has any responsibility for our children's schools. Nada. Hell, they won't even provide enforcement when schools violate city ordinances and building codes. Why? Is it because there is no money, no power, no prestige in doing the nitty gritty work? Or is it just because they have no interest whatsoever in residents' quality of life? That they are no more likely to support us than they are to rein in an out of control developer's authority, or misplaced government instituted chamber of commerce, or the incompetent leadership at city hall, particularly in the city manager's office and the police department. It is as if posturing about things outside their purview means no one will notice their failure to serve this city's residents. 

Maybe if these political do-nothings showed as much concern about fulfilling the commitments and responsibilities of the offices they hold instead of anything but that, this city wouldn't be the raging dumpster fire they have let it become. 

Pandemic Delusion Syndrome

The pandemic seems to be closely related to some serious disturbances in the farce, with some new and some amplified continuations of previous farcical behaviours. Let's look at a few.

Shocking to some is the rapid development and rollout of the picnic table app, to which TOD would simply say: make sure you pack your own picnic basket. What has some folks aghast is the fact that they've been at it for a decade now and still cannot get an app in place for identifying, tracking and resolving code violations. 

This leads immediately to the city's "enforce on complaint" which is employed whenever someone at the city feels like it. Complain about trucks violating the no-truck zone? Tough luck. Your neighbor keeping his motorized trailer in his driveway? Well there are about 1500 reasons for the city to jump on that. Some have suggested this is a follow the money issue as they have been told that there is not enough money in ticketing trucks. Frankly if Dunwoody were to apply appropriate fines there would be hell to pay with the folks at city hall who work on behalf of local businesses. 

And there are quite a few on our payroll working for business interests. We have a director of economic development and that's not to help out home-based businesses with their SLUP applications. Then there is the manager of business retention. Really. Now what do you suppose they do? After all doesn't "manager" mean there are employees being "managed?" Funny how there is no "manager of neighborhood preservation" or "director of resident satisfaction." Come to think of it, it really is NOT funny. 

Then there is the whole DPD kerfuffle, a raging dumpster fire that has become Dunwoody's version of the eternal flame. We've had police shootings with two "civilians" killed. There have been DWB and civil rights violations some yielding expensive court cases. If that's not enough we face a string of pending cases alleging  sexual harassment and the Top Cop will not answer questions about what he knew, when he knew it and if that wasn't until a lawyer dropped a dime, how he could be so clueless about what was going on under his nose. It is worth noting that he was not the candidate preferred by the Police Task Force and he has now lost support in the community with some calling for his resignation. Here's the punchline: the Top Cop's side hustle is coaching other cops on how to be a police chief every bit as good as he.

That DWB history is coming back to haunt with the BLM movement and SSR confessions all around. But not Dunwoody. Our Top Cop trots out personnel stats showing we have enough Black officers but might be short on Asians--the inconvenient minority. This dismissive approach to SSR hasn't worked well in practice. 

And we move on to the racial/racist underpinnings of the city itself with King John protesting that there was "nothing racial goin' on" yet immediately there were plans made to drive out Hispanics in PIB apartments and the power structure of the city and all its satellite organizations remain lily-white. But no "spoon-feeding" in this town. 

Let's close for now with the non-stop hating laid on the village. What's with that? Why do so many folks, hired guns as well as the seven dwarfs, so hate the village? They are hell bent on eliminating the village overlay with particular animus towards sign ordinances. In their recent "public survey on signs" it was all about the village. What about the similar business-retail at Mt. Vernon and Jett Ferry? Why no questions about signs that might be appropriate there? Or how about the business-retail center at Chamblee Dunwoody near 285? Why is the village singled out for 3000 rental residents (and yes, they will be rental, sooner or later)? Why not preserve a vital, vibrant SUBURBAN shopping and business center that has grown, organically, to serve the needs of the surrounding suburban neighborhoods? The Mayorette claims the village is the commercial center of Dunwoody, a mental turd that stinks up her "shilling for business" claims that high density residential is necessary for the amenities she wants-like perhaps a pandemic petri dish? Maybe she should head south from her office and see the real commercial center or maybe she should just lead the way for our top cop by submitting her resignation so the residents and voters have a chance to get someone who represents their interests.

Minding Inquiry

Tis the season of pondering, asking questions, getting evasions in return and casting votes nonetheless. As a backdrop, we all, deep down, knew this was not going to go our way. Lack of transparency, the transparently obvious "we're setting up a Development Authority, of, by and for developers" and a general back-tracking on anything even closely related to competent policing and code enforcement. To describe this, and all the other new cities, as mercenary is to disparage guns-for-hire all across the globe. Just look at the difference between a permit to install a garbage disposal and enforcing code violations. In the first case the city makes money and you actually are required to bring it to them. In the latter case it is just another expense that offers City Hall no benefit.

Except maybe every so often. Say at election time. Now is our opportunity to ask aspiring politicians questions and watch them hone their skills of evasion. Just ask them what they, personally, specifically intend to do about quality of life issues that are important to residents. Ask whether they will prioritize residents' concerns over catering to developer interests. Ask them if they know what happened to elected officials who have dropped the ball, been co-opted by the system, and just what they will do to avoid a similar fate. Ask them what they will do should we suffer from their failings.

Then vote.

Code Enfarcement

Council Calls This "Enforcement"

Walking It Back

The City of Dunwoody, which grossly overpaid for a City Hall and paying gawd only knows what to renovate the building is backing off on a commitment to be in the place starting the first of this year. From their fece-book page:

After much consideration, City council has decided to move back into the old city hall. We appreciate everyone's understanding of these changes. Sorry for the confusion. We will have a full statement out shortly.

Whiskey Tango Facebook! What can this be? A joke? Did someone hijack the City fece-book account? Did Grogan go Rogue and hit up the account with BS as a distraction? Was it too far from Fogo de Chão to suit Billy's Boy's tastes? Were they unable to get their ducks in a row such that The Right "which shall not be infringed" would be? And to maximum extent of their capabilities? Are they afraid the magnets in the MRI machines of Elite Radiology might disturb member of Council's trusty Piagets?

Some have pondered the discovery of asbestos. Or perhaps radon. Normally this would be late in the game as competently managed projects would check that in the early days. While the contractor surely checked there is a precedent with the City's handling of major paving projects yielding dictated inferiority. Maybe someone at City hall told the contractor to spread around some asbestos  or install radon sources. Perhaps someone has a cousin who runs an abatement firm?

But the important question remains unanswered: does this impact the re-branding effort?

Bullshit Walks

TOD has already pontificated on the absurdity of local government supporting a business that will put folks in a sweaty state of dehydration, likker 'em up and dump them into rush hour traffic and the supporting ordinance has been pulled. For now. The backpedaling sponsor clearly intends to ground-hog-day the measure: "I believe [...] that there will be a right time to introduce this." So expect the hammer to come back out and drive this screw in. When you least expect it. Until then the policy is 'go back to the "don't ask don't tell like" we have always done' which is a blatant statement that our elected officials are a bit more beholding to whoever "we" might be than to the wee folk who put them in office. 

More importantly this fundamentally undermines rule of law and the very ordinances that Council is responsible for crafting. Do any ordinances really matter when those responsible for them address being on the losing end of a debate or compromise by simply ignoring the law of the burg? This kind of attitude has no place in civil society let alone in representative government. 

Somebody Said It Better

Right here in our li'l village. One of our very own elected officials speaking about the hasty, if not pre-emptive demolition of the theatre in Brook Run is quoted in the AJC claiming to have said:

"If a check came in tomorrow from an outside person, we'd have us a new theater"

Of course this would require that over half of Council reverse their votes reneging on their well reasoned commitment to a teardown. And it plainly states that City Council can be had for a price. If there is a better way of saying "this city is for sale" it has yet to be articulated.

Signs Of Symbolism

The esteemed City Council is set to talk around LED signage in the City Limits. Given things like the sign below and other stick 'em in the dirt Dunwoody Village signs it isn't clear if anything Council does in regards to signs has a shelf life or teeth.

At least it is a "get out of town" sign

Given the track record with signage in the Village any other wind-sock ordinances will blow in whatever direction folks who want their signs want them to blow.

Official Shadow Government

"I read it on the internet" is a running joke loosely translating to "you cannot believe a word of it." Not so with legitimate journalism. How can we be so certain? Just ask any legitimate journalist--they'll tell you. The Dunwoody Fan Rag, our local font of legitimate journalism, has exposed Dunwoody's Shadow Government--the Dunwoody Homeowners Association. It is revealed in a recent front page article with this headline:

But not how you might imagine. The exposure resulted when the article, as one of such magnitude must, is split and continued further into the rag.

"page 9" is miraculously correct

And lest you think that was just a front page screwup, the article continues with:

"page 3" however is not

How could anyone in legitimate media get it wrong twice? They can't--they're just that good. So the only reasonable conclusion is that "the Council" is just code-word for "the DHA."

Back Where We Started

To be sure the drum beat the loudest in Dunwoody's march to citihood was "taxation without representation" countered with the promise that a city would ensure "local control." Perhaps so, but "rotten to the core" notwithstanding our Smart City That Should is beginning to look more and more like the County from which it fled.

The drafting of a comprehensive plan shows a widening gap between Staff and City denizens including some on Council. Not only that but whilst the draft is [allegedly] on the City website it is apparently like finding the pea under the walnut shell. Not so easy--sound familiar? Then when you do get the document what it contains has stirred a bit of a fuss.

Some feel they were sold Mayberry (they were) and they're getting Buckhead (they are). Some fear it caters to business growth with high density high rise development in areas outside of Perimeter Center and are not thrilled about five floors of office workers watching their kids swim in the backyard pool. Clearly the authors of the plan consider this a win-win. They get more tax revenue and you get free baby sitters.

Some are voicing their concerns in social media and town hall style meetings. Others are contacting their Council representatives. To the degree allowed by the genteel politeness of the South moving the City back towards the founding principle of creating a small southern town underpins the political campaigns of newcomers seeking open office or engaging in contested races.

These elections are the most important in this city's history and will likely decide whether Dunwoody is a complete sell-out to business and political greed or returns to its original mission.

Props

As much as it pains to set aside gadfly for gladfly it is time for credit where credit is due. And once again it is Councilman Shortal who has seen thru the Smart City's BS and spoken out against it.  This particular BS centered around the tax-hike fueled budget presented to Council wherein the grow-at-all-costs paradigm was applied to police department budgeting.

Councilman Shortal wants to know "what a lieutenant can do that a sergeant isn't doing now" to which the obvious answer is "cost this City more." Shortal's preference is that if more officers we must have then those officers be indians rather than chiefs. Furthermore he would really prefer that the budget be more focused on infrastructure (e.g., roads and sidewalks) over bloating the police force. He is spot on.

Shortal seems to have an insightful understanding of facts that should be, but apparently are not, obvious to all. Dunwoody's borders, it's geographical expanse is fixed and will not change.  Territorial expansion is not going to drive the clear need for more officers of any rank, but especially not the higher ranks. Population may increase but Dunwoody has been quite aggressive in limiting high density development. Population growth and demographic transformations will not drive police expansion either. Significant percentages of Dunwoody crime emanate from the Perimeter Center area most notably the mall--the crime rate per square foot at the Ravinia complex is significantly lower than Perimeter Mall. Even with that, the Mall itself is limited in growth opportunities that might drive crime and consequently police force expansion. Making the Mall a safer place requires presence but not an army of high ranking officers.

So Councilman Shortal is on target in suggesting that we may need more mall cops but we certainly do not need more desk jockeys.

While Shortal is spot on and should take a well-earned bow, he does pull up short. Clearly we need to end the interim positions. We need to hire a police chief that is aligned with the Dunwoody reality. One who understands this city will grow in quality, but the footprint is fixed and the demands relatively stable. That Dunwoody is not a place to grow your budget and head counts by double-digit percentages year over year. We also need to make progress on hiring a capable, experienced City Manager who will oversee operations including the police force. Dunwoody voters and taxpayers deserve no less.

Expensive Words

It may have been a cut-and-paste by the ubiquitous Staff and it may have seemed expedient at the time but these words and their (ab)use is likely to cost Dunwoody taxpayers a pretty penny:

The purpose and intent of the City Council in establishing the R-100 (Single-family Residential) District is as follows:

(a) To provide for the protection of neighborhoods within the City where lots have a minimum area of fifteen thousand (15,000) square feet;
(b) To provide for infill development in neighborhoods having fifteen thousand (15,000) square foot lots in a manner compatible with existing development; 
(c) To assure that the uses and structures authorized in the R-100 (Single-family Residential) District are those uses and structures designed to serve the housing, recreational, educational, religious, and social needs of the neighborhood. 

This comes from the Dunwoody Zoning Ordinance and is the statement of purpose and intent for R-100 zoning which covers residential lots under one acre (by implication of the other R-x00 codes) but over 15,000 square feet. Generally in law a legislative statement of purpose and intent is used during court proceedings to clarify gaps or vagueness in situations where the letter of the actual law (or code as in this case) does not clearly apply or convey the legislative intent.

In the situation with the Dunwoody Club Forest decision which is political at best and wrong at the very least a judge will most likely be called on to assess whether the Dunwoody City Council followed their own intent.  They have not. Council have stated, in the code, that their intent is to provide for, not deny, infill development. The winners of the debate as it stands today invoke the "in a manner compatible with existing development" clause, but the reality is that two very nice homes on generous, over 15,000 square foot lots, is not incompatible with surrounding nice, but older homes on similarly sized lots.

And the judge may consider whether the Dunwoody City Council has been consistent. They have not. If their intended use of this clause is to prevent "incompatible development" what say they to the development going on right now at the pipe farm? These appear incompatible with existing development as all of the neighboring, existing developments are apartments. In this case "consistent development" would be apartments as had been planned before the real estate bubble burst but which are instead, thru direct City interference, being replaced with single family residences.  Not compatible. Not consistent. Not likely a judge will look the other way.

The fact is the Dunwoody City Council has (ab)used zoning language they approved to do what they want, when they want and in a punitive fashion. We should all be concerned about the costs of these actions. Not just in dollars, but in integrity.

Who And What They Are Afraid Of

The short answers are:

1. you and 
2. ceding power. 

What brings this to the fore is the chazerai over the City Charter re-write in particular the part regarding establishment of a fire department or taking over any service provided by the county and assuming the associated costs with a simple majority of votes on council. To be clear it would be a simple majority of a voting quorum of council. 

Proponents of the re-write including some architects of the original charter argue that the Council already has this authority and have consulted legal counsel under the gold dome to bolster that claim. Opponents respectfully (or maybe not so respectfully) disagree and do not hold in high regard distant lawyers in the ATL offering rulings on the promises of a responsive local government.

But the proponents' argument is a deflective obfuscation. The real issue is (or should be) "is this the best we can do?" Why did they not take this opportunity to add to the charter a referendum requirement to cover these extraordinary commitments on behalf of the citizens? Why instead have they chosen to deny citizens a meaningful say? Is this really their idea of "responsive local government?"

That none of this has been openly debated is at the very heart of the current disagreements. This City was sold by our newage touchy feely "we're your neighbor" politicians on the promise of a "local government that is more responsive". This has turned out to be little more than typical political PR based on an incomplete comparison (more responsive than what? A VA hospital?) and further begs the question of to whom this government responds.

Consequently we have absolutely no hope of ever hearing a coherent explanation as to why it is so bad that citizens weigh in with a meaningful vote before the City moves forward on expensive endeavors that directly affect our lives in Dunwoody. After all if these proposals are such good ideas then surely the voters in this Smart City will be all in. When the idea is bad, as with the Parks Bonds, citizens' collective smarts can keep this City from making horrific mistakes. 

In the absence of intelligent discourse we are left to assume that politicians don't see it that way. Rather they see their authority and power being usurped by the ballot box and act as if the only intelligent thing the voters ever did or ever will do is elect them. Our current crop of politicians include those who (over) sold us on citihood with the promise that we'd have local control with a government "just down the street." They lied. They broke their promises and when given the chance to repair the damage by adding to the city charter a referendum  requirement they chose instead to slap citizens in the face by saying "it's always been this way we're just making it official so you morons can 'get it'."

Dunwoody Prostitution Enterprise Exposed

A recent satirical piece in the Dunwoody Crier speaks to an ongoing prostitution enterprise in our fair city and to give the devils their due it is an extremely well written bit of satire. When you read between the lines, as one must do with all satire, one finds a lurid tale describing the underbelly of a City that cannot shake a shady cast of characters including a powerful pimp, his harem of whores and a seemingly limitless supply of johns.

The brothel operates from a shady location signified in time honored fashion with the lighting of a red lamp signaling to johns the availability of worldly delights without casting sufficient light for innocent, or even curious passersby to discern the true nature of the transaction.

The whores are caked in excessive makeup and reek of cheap perfume in an effort to cover the traces left by the uses and abuses of johns who have come before. They gather in a parlor resonating with raucous music making themselves available for casual consortation before getting down to the business of the house. The pimp looks on, directing favored johns to the whore most suitable to his tastes.

The whores offer only a feigned resistance that serves as a requisite foreplay, a feeble attempt to disguise a faded and damaged flower as a fresh bud ready to be plucked. Deep down they know the john knows yet they both spare the time for the courtesy of this small but unnecessary formality. The dirty ceilings serve as a constant reminder that this is a filthy business. That johns are never satisfied. Pimps never handle enough money. And that whores are one bump or one bad blood test away from what little they do have.

As is so often the case this story demands much of the reader and is best absorbed on a hot summer's night with a scotch at hand and the soundtrack to Body Heat playing in the background. And on some certain Monday night, if you listen carefully you will hear in the distance the music to which these pitiful souls dance their tragic pas de trois and you'll know just where that red light dimly glows.