Dunwoody Beats Back Poverty

Dunwoody breathes a collective sigh of relief as Kroger pulls its Goodwill store plan. Not since the cityhood referendum has there been this great a cause for celebration, especially for the members of Citizens for a Clean and Pure Dunwoody. Current president Katherine "Katie" Chisolm and past president and co-founder Wendy Vespula were elated:

"This is a great victory, not only for our organization, but for all of Dunwoody", said Katie. "We've got a great community, a great culture with a solid history and now an increasingly bright future. We've come under significant outside pressure in recent years, but with a new city and now this victory, we're ready to move forward building on a solid past that was almost destroyed."

"That's right", added Wendy. "And, this isn't just great for Dunwoody, it is a win-win outcome. Our local church ministries have found that addressing the needs of the poor is enhanced when they are easily located and can be served within a reasonably compact geographic area. Dispersing them throughout other, more affluent communities makes it much more costly to offer needed services."

Katie offered further explanation: "Yes, and that's what Chamblee and Doraville are for. Dunwoody just isn't the place for that kind of operation. It belongs where those people already are and forcing them into this community would just frustrate them. After all, it would make it seem that the next rung up the ladder is out of their reach."

"That's right", Wendy concluded. "This is really the best for everybody."

We in The Other Dunwoody can all sleep better at night knowing that our neighbors, members of Citizens for a Clean and Pure Dunwoody, are watching out for us.

TOD

Poor To Set Up Shop

Rumor has it that Goodwill may open a retail facility in Dunwoody to serve the needs of Dunwoody's homeless and underprivileged and possibly draw upon the similarly disadvantaged in other communities.

Needless to say, the Dunwoody community is excited about the prospect.

During a chance encounter with a high ranking official of the Catholic Church at Oscar's Villa Capri that official reiterated "The Church's love for the poor...is a part of her constant tradition." While there was some obvious concern that this new facility represented real competition to their efforts to address the needs of the local poor, the official expressed confidence saying "we will kick their butts even if we have to pass the basket twice every mass from now until hell freezes over." When asked about donating his Jaguar, the conversation abruptly ended.

Baptist representatives on the other hand disclosed their belief that it was the mission of all God's children to amass as much wealth as possible and donate at least ten percent to their church. Where this money might go remains undisclosed but they do appear to be clearing ground for a new facility of some sort and expressed no concerned about local competition on the charity front.

A representative of a local Jewish congregation politely but firmly refused comment saying "we would prefer not to talk about money, particularly not having any" but seemed enthusiastic about the prospects of a new discount retail operation in Dunwoody.

Local Methodists were too busy addressing recently discovered moral black holes and the loss of parishioners to concern themselves with people looking for deals on blue jeans, but showed some interest when it was suggested this might be a good place to search for their lost ones.

Unitarians by and large remain committed to "addressing the issues of poverty of the mind" and viewed this development with somewhat detached curiosity.

All in all, it is so heartwarming to see this community, with all the distractions of creating a new city, pull together in the spirit of charity to help those less fortunate. This is the Dunwoody we all knew it would be.

TOD